But something happened this week. A story broke in the news that provoked such a visceral reaction, it kept me up last night. And urged me out of hibernation. You can read the story here: http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/brad-paisley-wife-nashvilles-kimberly-williams-paisley-forward/story?id=20782976
I could go on and on about how awful this person was. How awful all people who would do this are. But because of what I just said up there about life and shortness and all that, I won't. It doesn't deserve that much time and energy. Rather, I spent a lot of sleepless moments last night thinking of what I'd want to say to the Paisleys, and all those "celebs" who have been targeted by this kind of despicable behavior, if I could. And here it is...
Dear Brad and Kimberly,
You thought you were doing a good thing. The only thing you really could do. There's nothing on this earth like the thought of a dying child, especially when there isn't anything you can do to alter that reality. So you gave of yourselves, you got emotionally involved, you reached out, and you cared. Turns out, it was a big charade. But ya know what? You did EVERYTHING right. The fact that the person at the center did not deserve these things does absolutely nothing to change the absolute rightness of what you did. This I want you to know above all else.
See, I am a real mom of a kid with cancer. I'm one of too many. My son really did have neuroblastoma, and he really did die. For 23 months my husband, other children, and I watched him fight, suffer, and then die. During that time, we were incredibly blessed by a virtual army of people around us doing what little they could to try to make the journey better. I can not overemphasize the significance of the small, random acts of kindness we received. And since our son's death, we have purposely stayed in the world of childhood cancer to try to give back some of what was given to us, and to do something to change the outcome for the kids still fighting. It's a heartbreaking world. And just like the rest of the world, there are elements, and people surrounding it, that are just wrong. But what I have come to believe is that forever we are responsible only for our hearts, not the hearts (or actions) of others.
I pray that you won't let these pathetic, selfish actions make you bitter or shy away from reaching out to other cancer kids. Little is much, and I cannot express to you how much a simple thing like a phone call from someone they admire can mean to a child fighting so hard to live. Thank you. Thank you for trying to make life, however brief, better for a child. Don't abandon that desire. Cancer is the number one cause of death by disease in children in the United States. Until we change that, there are likely going to be more who reach out to you to encourage them or their child, to make them smile, to bring a bright moment to their last days. Please, embrace that. I believe it was Ronald Reagen who said, "trust, but verify." Do that. Then, please, don't be afraid to reach out to kids like ours. Though it may not seem like it, you have much to give them. And they have much to give you in return.
May God bless all of you who have responded in love to our hurting kids and families.....
5/16/2005--4/18/2009
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