When It Is......and It Isn't.

Easter Sunday....like a bazillion other people, I went to church today. Somehow in our connections group we got into a discussion about listening vs speaking when people are hurting. We touched on the things people often say in an attempt to comfort people who are suffering that somehow do not. For some strange reason, "wisdom" seems to come out of the woodwork when others are facing painful situations and we all desire to be the magic bullet (one of my hubby's favorite terms for this phenomenon) that "fixes" their hurt. We talked about how most of the time, these are moments when a listening ear is what's needed, not some great truth that will make it all right again (because most often, such a thing of course does not exist). Believe me, we heard plenty of these things after Braeden's death. We continue to hear them to this day, and so do countless others we know, when people can't quite grasp that we are not "all better yet." Things like, "he's in a better place," "he's no longer in pain," while true, don't really wield the power we'd like them to. They are a comfort, because I believe them, but at the same time they are not, because I am still here.

In our Resurrection Day service this morning, our pastor spoke of a classmate from seminary who died on Wednesday. His funeral service was the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter. He shared with us that the pastor who spoke at his funeral talked about that and reminded them that today is Saturday. He told the man's widow and children, family and friends, that they grieve because in this world we are stuck on Saturday. We know the work that has been accomplished, but the end result for us is not here yet. Sunday's coming, but for now, we're stuck at Saturday.

The fact that this second anniversary of Braeden's passing came during what we know as Holy Week has not eluded me. We have observed Passover, Good Friday, and Resurrection Day at the same time we have remembered Braeden's homegoing and celebration of life two years ago. Knowing in my heart what has been done and trusting in what has been accomplished on our behalf, the truth of this week, is a comfort because I know....and yet at the same time it isn't, because in a way, it's still Saturday.